What is the true meaning of failure?

From the 2025 TCS NYC Marathon Expo: The finisher medal that I failed to achieve, but the Wall of Fame for all entrants of the race on which I proudly earned my spot.

For those who have been following my recent updates, you know that I an not running the NYC Marathon today.  I was so close to my dream this time that I felt I could reach out and touch it.  But with five days to go before race day, I tore my hamstring on a short, easy pace run, and my dream of running this year is over. 

First, congratulations to everyone who crosses the finish line today! I’ll be out there cheering you on.  I now know what it takes to train for this amazing accomplishment, and you should be so proud of your success!

As for my journey, I can’t help but see this as another failure in my attempts to run this race – but one that is so much different.  I’ve never been this close before.  All other failures were so early in the process that heartbreak was not even part of my emotions.  I could accept the failure of something that seemed impossible and move on.  But this year, running 26.2 was anything but impossible.  I was so confident and ready for it that I had no doubt that I’d be crossing the finish line.  I put my all into this, and the benefits were real and tangible.  Sunday was simply going to be about putting the cherry on top.  In some ways, I saw it as a validation of everything I did.  But in reality, I needed no validation of what I accomplished.  To the extent this was a failure, it was the best failure of my life.

As I look back on the past five months, I imagine where I’d be today if I never tried this.  There’s no part of me that would be better off for that.  I’m also not sure that I would be any better off if just had that one more moment of crossing the finish line today.

A lesson I’ve learned from rock climbing is that failure is not only part of the game, but it is something you aim for.  If I haven’t fallen on some climbs, then I haven’t tried hard enough out there.  I’d never know where my current limits are and would never have a bar to set of what to overcome next.  In fact, all that success means is that it’s time to set the bar higher.

These last few months changed my life.  With each long run above 13.1 miles on my training plan, I pushed my body to new limits.  When I went out to run 14, then 16, then 18, and finally 20 miles, each of those runs was unchartered territory that I approached with some apprehension because of the unknown.  As I achieved a new record with each distance, my confidence grew – both because I did it and because I was ready to go for more.  But there was even more that went into reaching those distances.  I didn’t reach those milestones simply by trying a new long run each week.  I did it by running four days each week with varying distances and paces.  I did it by combining speed work, hill repeats, tempo runs, and easy pace runs throughout each week.  I did it with my diet, my sleep, and my recovery routines.  I did it by putting everything I had into preparing for the final exam on November 2.  Yet, in this instance, my grade on the final exam of finishing the 2025 New York Marathon was an F.  But a failing grade does not make this a failure.

Growing up, there are times in school where I could get by in a class with little effort to get an A on a test.  When I got my grade, I showed it off as if I had done something.  At times, there were also courses where it took all my efforts to only end up with a C.  I walked away from that feeling inadequate.  Ultimately, I viewed each of those scenarios with entirely the wrong perspective.  The failure in life was putting no effort into the A.  I gained nothing from it.  The success was when I worked hard and pushed myself to do the best I could, no matter what the result in the end.  Ultimately, the true test of success is in how I approached the journey – regardless of whether the result in the end was an A or an F. 

What made me better – and more prepared for life – was learning from putting my all into something.  In school or work, that’s where improvement comes from.  In fitness, that’s how you get stronger.  In life, that’s how you grow.

While grades or medals are not given out based on effort, effort is the true measurement of success.  Effort – even when it results in failure – is what unlocks greatness.  Don’t just take it from me.  Here it is from one of the greatest of all time . . .

Still, there’s no denying that failures – especially the best and biggest ones – come with heartbreak.  After injuring myself on Tuesday morning, I spent most of the day as I waited to see the doctor later that afternoon, in tears over my shattered dream.  The physical pain was excruciating, but the real agony was knowing what that pain meant.  I burst into tears when I first said, “I don’t think I can run the marathon on Sunday.”  Even days later as I write these words, I have tears in my eyes.  But I know that these tears are really the reward of the effort I put into this and all that I achieved during this process – not only during the five months of training, but also throughout this nearly 11-year journey of hoping to run this race.  Each tear I shed comes from something I achieved during this process – which is why there are so many of them.  I hold no shame in this failure – only extreme pride in the process that led me to it.

But there’s more reward in this failure than simply a journey that has seen so many accomplishments.  Over the course of any journey, there are sure to be setbacks – some that are more difficult or painful than others. No matter how extreme the obstacle, it makes the destination more difficult to reach.  And in that is the opportunity to do something hard.  It was never going to be easy to run a marathon, but running one when it was made even harder is a gift.  Though it may not seem that way at the time, everything that gets in the way of your dream is what makes it that much sweeter when you reach it.  In some ways, it’s the obstacles that that made me addicted to this path in the first place.

Failing is about living outside of your comfort zone.  As I’ve said before, one of my mottos is, “Do one thing every day that scares you.”  The true meaning of that is not about jumping off cliffs, skydiving, or any of my other adrenaline seeking adventures.  It’s about overcoming the fear of failure.  Succeeding without the likelihood of failure is like the “A” I got on my test without studying for it.  It’s empty.  But failing at something hard while coming so close to achieving it nearly fills my cup.  Thankfully though, it leaves it with a little more space to fill.

In this case, that’s all I need – a little more to fill the cup.  I was ready to run the race.  Without an injury, I knew I’d cross the finish line today.  And I now have the experience of completely training for a marathon to bring into next year’s race.  Ironically, I got so close, that so much of this next year will be in my comfort zone.  Still, I’m not naïve enough to think that the scars from this year won’t be there.

Not everyone gets a second chance at the greatness they failed to achieve.  For some, there are times when the shot at a dream it is limited to a single moment, and the agony of a loss is where it ends.  But life doesn’t end with the loss, and everything you learn from putting your all into that shot, is what will make you better for the rest of your days.

But for me, I get another shot at my dream next year.  And the year after, if need be.  And so on.  I believe I’ll run this race, and I know I can.  In the end – even though this is not the end – failing big at this 2025 NYC Marathon was among my greatest achievements.

Aaron